Obviously it has been a few days since I have written. I was away for 3 days and yesterday was playing catch up. So today I need to write FOUR days worth! Here we go...
AUGUST 11 - DAY 62
I went back and read Luke 4. I am technically in Luke 11 in the sermon series I am in...but I wanted to go back and read some more. I heard a guy once say that he wants to emulate Jesus and therefore should do what Jesus does. Well God ALSO told me to not only sit at Jesus' feet while he teaches but also to look at his life and see that as a teaching. Watch him. What does he do? Who does he talk to? How does he talk to them? When does he wake up? How does he spend his time? Etc. So I went back to Luke 4 and read about Jesus teaching in Nazareth (his home town). Here he is rejected because he says not only is he here for the Jews but also the Gentiles. I LOVE LOVE LOVE why he came to the earth:
Luke 4:18-19
“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to set the oppressed free,
19 to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”
Everything in these verses is positive. There is no guilt. No condemnation. Only positive things. God is good! After teaching this and explaining that he is here for the Gentiles and Jews, the Israelite's get mad. But Jesus just teaches unabashedly. He teaches the truth no matter what. It angered some people. But he spoke it anyway because they needed to hear it.
So lesson of the day: Jesus is SUPER amazing and positive and only came to earth for good reasons AND Jesus taught the truth without shame. He told it like it is. He didn't mince his words or hide the truth. He just taught it like it is. I think I knew both of these lessons already but how neat to re-read it and see HOW Jesus goes about his teaching.
AUGUST 12 - DAY 63
On this day I did the same as yesterday. I read the rest of Luke 4 and learned from Jesus. In the two stories I read, here is what happened. In the first story Jesus heals a man from being demon possessed. What I learned in this story is that Jesus taught with authority - again he didn't shy away from the truth. He knew what was true and taught it with the authority he had (which we now have as Jesus' followers) AND that he had authority over demons. Again I KNOW these things, but to just read Jesus doing his thing so confidently without shame, without shying away, without being wishy-washy. He knew who he was and he owned it. In the second story Jesus heals many people late into the night. Then the next morning he gets up early to be alone with God. The lesson here? It's more important to spend time with God than it is to sleep. He was likely tired, but God sustained him.
AUGUST 13 - DAY 64
This day was a total write off. I was SO tired and was listening to lies from the devil all day. I was a totoal mess emotionally and not in a good place. I chose to spend my hour just listening to worship music in hopes of coming to a place of worship. The one silver lining was that I thought about how despite the lies I was believing about myself, I could still worship God for who he is. Because I was able to worship God I was reminded by God that if I can worship him for who he is (loving, holy, good, gracious, etc.), then what I believe about myself (the lies) HAVE to be lies because God wouldn't say those things to me if he is who he says he is. Anyway, I know what I was believing were lies but sometimes it is so hard to battle that. I felt much better today and I think sleep helps that A LOT.
AUGUST 14 - DAY 65 (today!)
I listened to a sermon today about prayer. The pastor asked a few questions.
1) Am I praying my will or God's will?
2) Am I willing to pray and live my life based on what God wants and for his glory instead of what I want?
3) Do I give up on prayer when I don't see results?
4) Do I seek out results for my prayers? (Ask, SEEK knock)
Anyway lots of good questions. Do I look at God as a geine there to just answer my questions or am I genuinely living for what HE wants. I know the answer. I know I look at him and expect him to answer my prayers EVEN if I think my prayers are not selfish. I am not asking for fancy cars or lots of money or anything. But I know I am still more selfish than I'd normally like to admit. Much confessing still to come. I don't want to live for me...and yet I obviously do. Ohhh a long way to go on this journey. Thankfully God is gracious. I think I can end EVERY blog post with that same reminder to myself.
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